Or maybe the unpopularity has to do with other well-documented reasons such as…well, let’s go easy on the old guy. Thank you. I am old, and golly gee, I do try and be nice, Sometimes. Rudeness, I guess, may be a reason. Yes, grumpiness may be another, and yes, arrogance could possibly be added to the list. I know. I know. I wasn’t going to leave off selfishness, immaturity and brazen bravado. How ’bout that for alliteration?
Anyway, back to the definition of “whiner.” Here it is on Pg. 1,619 of “Webster’s New World Dictionary of the American Language,” second college edition, copyright 1984. In fact, this is the same old, now-raggedy-torn dictionary, I used when I was a struggling copy editor at the Los Angeles Times.
The definition of whiner is: “to utter a peevish. high-pitched, somewhat nasal sound, as in complaint, distress, fear, etc.” It goes on, “to complain or beg in a childishly undignified way, as with a whine.”
My God, that fits me to a tee. Overstated, of course, and with tongue firmly planted in cheek, but what an exact recount of the word.
Now, here’s why I most assuredly bored you guys with this examination of the whine. It is in direct regard to my inability to accept with even a modicum of dignity; chronic back pain driven by “trashed” facet joints; the haunting and perpetually visiting kidney stone; a root canal of deep proportions; kidney stones again; something called joggers hematuria; subsequent hospitalization, and some of the doctors attached to such stays; medicine – well, that’s what they call it anyway; and the kind thoughts expressed by well-meaning folk lost in the dust of their own scrabble word games.
These medical issues are, in fact, real and started with me Jan. 1 of this year. As a result, I have been introduced to my body for the last 10 weeks in ways like never before. From head to toe, I have seen parts of my anatomy by way of CT scans, MRIs, X-rays, radioactive dyes, cystoscopy, and that’s just to name a few of the medical adventures I’ve been through the past 2 1/2 months.
So, yes, I am whining. I am uttering words in a “high-pitched … nasal” sounding voice. And most certainly, I am complaining and begging in a “childishly undignified way.” I don’t want to go through this anymore.
Lastly, some good news. The joggers hematuria only rears its ugly head after I run. It does so by having a good amount of blood in my…no need to go there. This is a family column after all. As I said, it only happens directly after I run. I ran yesterday and there was no blood in my… . Thank you, God! Funny how the small things begin to matter when you start to lose the big things.