So, what exactly are those bumps at curbs?

Everyday I walk over them. I look down at them. I pull shopping carts over them to the sound of rat-ta-ta-tat, rat-ta-ta-tat. Oftentimes they are yellow in color. Other times red or blue. Mostly though they are yellow. But what are they? That’s what I want to know.

They, of course, are those squares of colored bumps at all curbs, mostly wheer you cross the street. They are placed at other areas as well, but mostly at entrances or exits to buildings. Somebody told me they are for the blind, so they can know when they are rapidly approaching the front door of an establishment. I am not trying to be insensitive here, just curious.

I have asked people. “I have no idea?” They respond. I asked the people in the business. “I don’t know?” The respond, sometimes with annoyance. I tried to find an address that I could write and get an answer. There was none. I called my city. “No idea? Good question, though,” they replied, between munches on their sandwiches.

Perhaps that’s true. I don’t know  and I want to know. So, if there’s anybody out there in TV land that has the answer, please be so kind to share it with this dunderhead of a goof that can’t tell the difference between a death in the family and a broken shoelace.

Never forget, which I know you never do, I have the intelligence of house paint, preferably from Home Depot because that paint is pretty smart. That is not too say the other paints are not smart. They are. I just think of Home Depot’s house paint when I think of my deductive abilities or lack of them. Oh, whatever!

OK. Now, that that is out-of-the-way, we can get to the serious business of governing. The political season is upon us and it’s wild and woolly already. The GOP is slamming Obama, Obama is doing likewise to the GOP, and as a famous columnist used to sign off every column: ” …And so it goes.”

I don’t pretend to have any answers to any of these problems because if I did, then we would really be in trouble. I can’t even find out what those squares are that go rat-ta-ta-tat, rat-ta-ta-tat, when you drag your shopping cart over them. What are they? Pray tell, someone must have an answer.

“And (ah yes, a bit of thievery here) so it goes.”

P.S. One last thing, a friend of mine said she loved my columns but when she first looked at them, she muttered “My God! Look how long they are.” She then would read them and get, as she said, get so engrossed, “I couldn’t stop reading it.” Thank you for the nice thought.

I bring this up because this is a short one, just for you, Olivia. May the lord take a liking to you because you’re a likable person. Well, maybe it’s not all that short. I better shut up while the shutting up is good.

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About stevewhitmore

Former award-winning newspaperman and broadcast journalist, both radio and TV, spanning three decades. Army-trained paralegal, court bailiff and prosecutor's lead investigator for the 8th Infantry Division's Judge Advocate General's Corp., Mainz, Germany. 1973-1975.
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